Canada is home to a vibrant and resilient trans community that finds its roots in the cities and towns that populate the country. With a variety of gender-affirming care options available and protective 2SLGBTQ+ legislation, Canada is widely regarded as one of the safest places in the world to be transgender.

Jane Paoletti, a 29-year-old trans woman, has lived in Toronto her whole life. She goes to George Brown College, and feels supported by most people in her academic environment. Although, she is hesitant to trust this support.

“I’m super proud to be who I am. I’m super grateful for the people that care about me,” Paoletti said. “But, you know, I’m always looking over my shoulder.”

In recent years, anti-trans legislation has been taking shape in provinces across the country. Transfeminine juror and activist, Celeste Trianon, maps out this trend in her latest update to the Canadian Anti-Trans Risk Assessment. 

With laws already passed in Saskatchewan and Alberta, and the country’s growing conservatism, trans Canadians are concerned about their safety and continued access to hormone replacement therapy and other life-saving, gender affirming care.

Beau Cassidy, 29, is a trans man who works as an audio engineer and music producer in Toronto. 

“Right now, it’s destabilizing,” said Cassidy, detailing the impact this shift has had on his experiences this year. “No matter where you turned, who you are is being debated, and that’s just a waste of everybody’s energy.”

The facets of Canada’s settler colonial foundations often conflict with queerness. Queer experiences of gender tend to subvert the stricter, more patriarchally defined gender ideals that the Western world is known to have introduced to Indigenous communities during colonization. So, it’s no surprise that trans people tend to have complex relationships with Canadian identity.

Zymbul Fkara, a non-binary transfemme in her mid 30s, feels an “instability” between her trans and Canadian identities. 

“I’ve learned that my capacity for clarity and transparency, as well as to have boundaries as a Black trans person in Canada, is in opposition to the performance of being Canadian, and is often seen as a threat within Canadian politeness,” they said.

Fkara is Jamaican, Guyanese and Canadian. She feels that her mixed background is disruptive to a culture where what is often perceived as Canadian is centred around whiteness and the gender binary that accompanies it.

“I realize what I am asked to do to have safety is to assimilate further into Canadian-ness,” they explain. “What that requires is my erasure.”

Trans safety in Canada today

In a country that has only recently begun to recognize the diverse variety of Indigenous gender identities, whiteness plays a large role in the level of marginalisation that trans people face.

According to Trans Pulse Canada’s Nov. 2020 Report, racialized trans Canadians experience higher rates of discrimination, violence and harassment. This is true even in the context of the already high rates experienced by non-racialized trans people.

The increase in legislation targeting trans youth is accompanied by a growing sentiment of transphobia that is felt by Paoletti, Fkara and Cassidy. None of them feel completely safe living as trans in Canada today.

“There’s been exponential curves very quickly, and I think that’s led to people having a lot of fear of change,” said Cassidy, describing his experience navigating Toronto as a trans man. “I think that transness has been a scapegoat for that. Specifically, transfemininity.”

This fear is all too familiar for trans women and transfemmes like Paoletti and Fkara. “It’s really hard to have that feeling of security and safety when you hear something happening to trans women all the time,” Paoletti said, “whether it’s in Canada or otherwise.”

Even in the midst of this fear, the trans community can provide much needed relief and a sense of safety for its members. Paoletti, Fkara and Cassidy all expressed deep gratitude for the impact that queer community has had on their lives in Toronto.

“There is a fluidity, a currency of care that I think isn’t prevalent everywhere,” Fkara said. She cites cites transfemmes, nonbinary folks and transmascs as the people she feels most protected by.

One of Paoletti’s favourite parts about living in Toronto is being able to live openly as a trans woman, despite the “give and take” of the consistent challenges it brings. This is a shared sentiment with Fkara and Cassidy. “It’s a profound gift,” Cassidy said.

“The joy of just becoming myself and knowing that I can continue growing,” Cassidy said. “It’s beautiful, and I hope that for everybody.”

“I want all trans people to have that.”

This story is part of the Toronto Observer’s Our Canada feature package. Check out more stories and videos.